Opinion: Self-discovery through another's eyes.

Tonight's post is going to be a little bit different than usual. I've been meaning to write about this for a while, but now I'm getting around to it in an attempt to procrastinate on the important academic stuff I should be dealing with instead. A few weeks ago, I was having this gag-worthy adorable conversation with my boyfriend- he was telling me everything he's observed about me these past two years. And as he was listing more and more things, I came to a realization- we take so much of who we are for granted!

I'm not sure if I'm expressing what I want to say correctly. Basically, from the inside, growing into our own bodies, we become accustomed to ourselves to the point where there's never a sense of novelty. We just kind of take every little aspect of who we are and shrug it off as just that- a part of who we are. In doing so, we might think of ourselves as ordinary people with nothing special to offer, but from an outsider's perspective, things may be different. Throughout our talk, I found myself thinking, 'Oh, wow, this really is me!' He was mentioning little things, that have always been such a huge part of who I am, yet I've never been able to detach myself from them enough to identify them as traits, assets, hobbies, etc. As an example, I'm studying journalism because I'm tired of all the negativity the press is bombarding us with on a daily basis, and I would like to play a small part in the shift to positive news. Frequently, I spend my time watching UpWorthy videos, or scrolling through Buzzfeed's cute love-filled community posts. More than anything else, this is the stuff I share with my boyfriend, and, until he brought it up, I failed to realize just how important it was to identify this aspect of my life as a passion rather than just a habit.  Society places such a strong emphasis on figuring yourself out rather than relying on other people's descriptions, and while it's an empowering concept, it does has its flaws. For one, as mentioned before, sometimes things become us to a point where we can't peel off the layers and analyze them as individual traits forming a whole. But another, equally important aspect is the fact that people tend to sugarcoat the way they view themselves and describe themselves more in terms of who they'd like to be than who they actually are. In theory, a lovely concept. In practice, a dose of realism really should be applied.

The moral of the story is this- you owe it to yourself to ask for an honest description of how you're perceived by other people. It could be your parents, it could be your significant others, it could be your friends. They could have some pretty strong insight into who you are, and what your strengths and weaknesses come across. You don't have to take their opinions to heart if you don't want to, but don't cheat yourself out of the opportunity to hear them.

Ever use the expression 'You know me better than I know myself'? Well, sometimes it's a major truth-bomb.

Thanks for stopping by :) 

Lifestyle: Midterm Check-In.

As busy college students, we often forget to thank our bodies and our minds for everything that they put up with on a daily basis. During midterm season, we ignore our need for relaxation, for relief, for love. Between pulling all-nighters and binge-watching Netflix shows, little time remains for us to untangle our thoughts.

Showing yourself a bit of love does not have to be a daunting, time-consuming task. In just a few minutes, you can procrastinate productively and give your mind a break academically. Here are some suggestions:

If you have 2 minutes...

make yourself some tea

Whatever mood you are in, there's a tea out there for you! 

If you have 5 minutes...

plan your next step

Write down the main tasks for the next day- seeing them on paper helps!

If you have 10 minutes...

pick out tomorrow's outfit/pack your supplies

You'll feel less guilty about hitting the snooze button the next day- and less likely to be late to class because of it!

If you have 15 minutes...

organize your workspace

By working in a clean environment, you will be able to focus more on the task than the mess around it.

If you have an hour...

go exercise

Yoga is a dream during stressed-out periods! 

I hope my midterm stress-relief tricks have inspired you to take a break and focus on loving yourself, even for a tiny minute. Good luck with everything, and thank you for stopping by! 

Lifestyle: Freshman Year Review.

College may or may not be the best thing that's ever happened to me. This past week, I finished my freshman year, and I could not be more sad about this. It means I have 3 years left to be carefree. Then I have to worry about grad school and real life and honestly the thought of all that makes me a bit nauseous.

Alas, it's been a lovely year, and while there have been some things I wish I had done differently, for the most part I think I have it figured out. Here I will share a few things I believe I've done right, as well as a few things that could have gone better. Hopefully future freshmen will follow my advice as well as my warnings.

College is awesome! Don't mess up.

• School:

I feel good about... having spent time in the library. My dorm was pretty social, and I get easily distracted, so the library was great for actually being productive. I had my own spot that I sat in all the time, and I just got lost in my own head, and, most importantly, got things done when I needed to. That left even more time for socializing :). Honestly, the library and student union are two places to really take advantage of if you need to study or just need a moment away from everybody.

This could have gone better... the one thing I regret in terms of school is not trying harder in my physics class. I suck at science, and I just used that as an excuse all semester, convincing myself it's the only reason I failed the class (just kidding though, I got a B, but that's pretty much failing in my eyes). What was most upsetting was the fact that it was my only B for the year...and it was a 4-credit hour class. The professor was a douchebag, but I feel that had I put more time and effort into the class, I could have gotten an A. So moral of the story: don't use the fact that you're weak in a subject as an excuse. Put maximum time and effort, and you'll pull through. I didn't and I want to punch myself in the face because of it.

• Finances:

I feel good about... the fact that I had a set budget for the entire year and planned accordingly. By the end of the school year, I had managed to save up for a weekend trip to California (plane tickets and all), as well as an extra $500 to go towards my housing and meal plan next semester. At the beginning of each month, I went to an ATM, took out a certain amount of cash, and tried to stick to that amount for the entire month. Naturally, there were some times when I went a bit overboard (not by much). It's much more difficult to be ok with parting with your cash than it is to swipe a card, though. I also actively tried to write down my expenses, and I've noticed where I can cut costs next year.

This could have gone better... books. Campus bookstores are complete ripoffs. My first semester, I purchased all of my books (used) at the bookstore. Second semester, I rented them from an off-campus bookstore. There was a significant price difference, but I still feel like there's more I could have done about it. Next semester I'm going to try book renting services such as chegg.com, or get in touch with people that have already taken the classes I need and own the books. Get creative with it! The cost adds up pretty quickly!

• Social Life:

I feel good about... getting involved in extracurriculars. Since I stayed in state for undergrad, I see a lot of familiar faces all the time. I also roomed with one of my closest friends from high school. Knowing people was quite lovely, but I still wanted the college experience. Getting involved in clubs where I didnt't know anybody was the best decision I've ever made. It was refreshing to enter a world where nobody knows me, meet new people, and make new friends. I joined a club which deals with the international students studying on campus and the people I've met through it are some of the most amazing people ever. Other than extracurriculars, just going with the flow and accepting invitations even when you want to be lazy could make for a great time. Just explore! That is, as long as you stay safe.

This could have gone better... having my own fun rather than monitoring everyone else's fun. While for the most part, I enjoyed my time and didn't care about what anybody else was doing, I did have lazy days every once in a while. Now, those lazy days can be useful. If you need to recharge your batteries or study and catch up on work, they're great days! My mistake was not using these days properly. Instead of staying in and going to bed early, getting rested and caught up on work, I ended up going to bed late and stalking everybody else's fun on Facebook. Don't do that. It's a complete waste. And the sad thing is, it wasn't an activity I was consciously partaking it. It was strictly out of habit. 

• Wellness:

I feel good about... taking advantage of the gym. Working out in a specialized setting is going to be so difficult once I graduate. Classes are expensive. Gym memberships are expensive. I've spent about 2 hours a day at the gym this past year, doing back to back classes for Body Blast and Zumba. While the cardio room is all fine and dandy, classes are what really did it for me, just because I pushed myself harder. No one wants to be THAT person that slacks off, you know. Also, I decided to take Body Blast and Buns'n Abs classes in order to face my fear of weights. I've always been terrified of lifting, not because I fear getting buff, but just because the way I would go about if I were to go training on my own just wouldn't really be beneficial for my body. I enjoyed the results of these classes. On move-in day, I could barely carry up a hamper full of clothes. On move-out day, I carried my microwave and my TV to the car from the second story. It doesn't sound like a big achievement, but it's better than where I used to be.

This could have gone better... food consumption. While my workout schedule was impeccable, my diet completely counteracted it. Every day, I'd go to the dining hall with good intentions, thinking salad bar Salad Bar SALAD BAR. But every time, something else would draw me in. Pizza and grilled cheeses, anyone? It also killed me that our dining hall had delicious chocolate chip cookies. It didn't happen often, but when it did, I had to take advantage. And by advantage, I mean having 4 cookies at a time. Next year, I will approach the problem differently and make cheat days for myself. A week of health= a yummy reward on Sundays. Hopefully that will work. First semester I'll stick with a dining plan, but little by little I'm going to try to start making my own healthy food and give up on the meal plan second semester.

Hopefully my rants about what went right and wrong will help at least one future freshman make wise-ish decisions. 

One last thing: Be careful about partying. It can be really fun, but it can go wrong as well. Don't be a daredevil and know your limits. Also acknowledge when things get bad and get out of there. 

Cheers! 

Lifestyle: Freshman Year Advice.

Though this is not in any sense going to be a fashionable post, I do suggest you read up on all of the college expertise I have acquired within the past few months. Just kidding about the expertise part, but I do have some decent advice about surviving college and all that jazz :):

1. First off, work out. Most, if not all schools have free gym benefits for full time students, and relatively cheap ones for part timers. If simply hitting the treadmill or weights won't work for you, there's always fun classes like Zumba, yoga, and body blast! The Freshmen 15 aren't just a myth and you are bound to get closer to them if you don't have incorporate some sort of physical activity into your lifestyle. Plus, you indirectly pay for that stuff, so might as well use it! 
2. Secondly, learn to say no. This doesn't necessarily pertain to drinking, drugs, or sex, but all peer pressure activities. Think about it! In high school we all enjoyed having our little car and being what we deemed as 'independent'. Well, true independence comes from learning how to be your own person and not doing things just because everyone's doing it. I'm not saying any of these things are bad things to try, but it should be your decision, and you should have legitimate reasons. Curiosity is a good enough reason as long as it is purely your curiosity and not other people's beliefs shoved down your throat.
3. Thirdly, enjoy your own company. This is depressingly underrated in college, but it's okay to feel a bit overwhelmed with the social scene and just step back sometimes. This entire experience should be about figuring out who YOU are and what's a better way to do that than simply spending time in your own head? Reading a book, watching a movie, lounging around, working out, going for a walk in your beautiful campus are all such pleasant and relaxing activities! At some point in time everybody needs a break from the world! Plus, who cares that you chose to spend one Saturday night in your dorm instead of going out with friends? You have 4 entire years of this, and it's so much more exciting when going out doesn't become a routine!
4. Fourthly, try not to study in the dorms. Now, the thing about the dorms is that it's really easy to get distracted. Someone stops by to say hi and you end up wasting all this precious time you could be using to get things done, and then you stress out, and then you go on Facebook and bitch about how much of a procrastinator you are, which leads to more procrastination and so on and so forth. College libraries are pretty nice places to spend your time in, and if you manage it wisely, there's plenty of time left for the social scene. Do your work in libraries, computer labs, and even if the outdoors if the weather permits, but use the dorms as a space for sleeping and socializing more than anything. The library is such a nice resource and it would be a pity to not take full advantage of it. 
5. Completely contrasting one of my main points, but be a 'yes' man. Here's the catch. You should learn how to say no for situations in which you truly have no interest in doing whatever people are trying to get you to do. Now, if your reasons for not wanting to go a certain place or try a certain thing is strictly the fear of the unknown, don't just write it off based on that fear! College is the perfect time to come out of your shell and try some new things! Honestly, you're only young once, and if you stay locked up your entire life you're bound to regret it later on. Live a little, but within reason :).

These are my main pieces of advice for the everyday college student. I hope they somehow provided you with a new outlook on life and you've discovered yourself while reading these lines or something enlightening like that. Remember, work hard, have fun, and stay relatively stylish! Step away from the frumpy sweatpants/frumpy sweatshirt duo! (Though that is a bit hypocritical of me to say, as I just came back from my lab wearing that exact combination- in my defense, the sweater was sequiny and the sweatpants were skinny). 

I hope you enjoyed this post, and most importantly, I hope you're enjoying your time in college :)

Thank you for stopping by!